Are Some People, Despite Looking Good On Paper, Just not Relationship Material?
January 22, 2012
Recently I was going out with this one woman. We went out on a few dates and that was it. I probably actually went out on one date too many. The reason why I went out on that extra date was because she seems great on paper.
Let’s call this woman Jill. Jill is pretty, goal oriented, fun, low maintenance, great at conversation, confident, and perfectly suited to be brought home to mom, but for whatever reason I did not feel any sort of romantic spark. I enjoyed my time with Jill, and despite having chemistry and finding her attractive, I didn’t find myself attracted to her romantically.
Why is this? I usually don’t think much of this, but when I told her how I was feeling, she said something that made me ask myself this question. Jill thanked me for being honest and upfront with her and said “I’ve unfortunately had this conversation many times.” This caught me off guard, how could someone like Jill have these problems? She has also never been in a long or serious relationship, just short stints.
I’ve met women who are pretty and are fun to be with, but are just weird and/or socially awkward, but Jill isn’t like that. She doesn’t go for the bad boys and people won’t look at her like she is weird. She isn’t over bearing, and is not clingy, but is able to show the right amount of interest to let the man know she is interested.
So is Jill, and other people just not relationship material? Is there some unidentifiable characteristic that makes a person desirable to have a relationship with beyond the obvious? I don’t know, but I am starting to think there does exist some uncontrollable and unidentifiable characteristic that makes people attracted to each other on a romantic level.
